1
Can a
kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
2
Doctor:
"I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to
live."
Patient:
"What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"
Doctor:
"Nine."
3
A man asks a
farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead
of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”
The farmer
says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the
4:11 one.”
4
It is so
cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
5
My dog used
to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
6
What is the
difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
-
Snowballs.
7
Mother, “How
was school today, Patrick?”
Patrick, “It
was really great mum! Today we made explosives!”
Mother,
“Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at
school tomorrow?”
Patrick,
“What school?”
8
I wanted to
grow my own food but I couldn’t get bacon seeds anywhere
{Source: Happie}
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